By: Trump Vang
Note: This is a student generated work of satirical fiction
Disclaimer: This article may not be accurate to real life experiences, rather just real life expectations.
Do you want to someday rule the world? Everyone has thought of it before, but ruling the world can be a bit difficult as a normal citizen. Contrary to popular belief, it’s a lot easier than many think. To show you, I’ve got 12 simple steps to help you on your journey to dominating the world.
Step 1 : Set Goals
This may seem arbitrary to do, but goals are an important part of this process. They’ll allow you to focus on a few main ideas, and how to execute them at the same time. Although when thinking of goals, one can become too ambitious at times.
Create smaller goals and actions such as “Gaining trust of loved ones by cooking them scented pies” rather than just “Rule the pie industry by yourself”. These smaller goals should allow for those to take smaller steps to reach their overarching goal in the end. Our overarching goal is to “RULE THE WORLD” but we must make smaller goals and take steps to get to this position we want.
Simply put, being too ambitious won’t get us anywhere and we need to take it slow, so one can achieve the world domination that they want.
Step 2 : Go under the radar
After you’ve set up your goals, you can start the process to world domination. Depending on what your goals are you can take different actions to ensure this step is taken into account.
You need to go under the radar, so you won’t be caught doing your processes to reach your goal. Staying in sight of corporations and organizations allows you to be seen doing acts leading to world domination.
Going under the radar will allow you to do these smaller steps whilst no one is watching at all, leading to your smaller goals. You may meet accomplices and others whilst in this process, and you can let them in on your plan, but remember that you must stay under the radar, and you need to know who you can trust.
In this world, betrayal is common, and whistleblowers are all about. You can’t let them tell everyone about your plan, and you must be careful about letting people onto your plan.
If you are spoken about to the authorities, it’s over and there’s no coming back to the scene. You can’t let yourself fall to their actions against you. Once you’ve started, there’s no going back.
Rule #1: Crimes
These rules should help ensure your position’s safety, as well as your path there. There will be more coming up to guide you on your path to world dominance.
Don’t commit any crimes in the early part of this plan. Doing so will alert others of your presence, and allow them to target you and your path to success. Try to find ways around problems that don’t involve crimes, even petty ones. Only do so if necessary to the plan, and try to stay out of sight of any untrusted others.
Crimes may seem like the easy way to take in life, but for this plan especially, try to limit the amount that you commit. Otherwise your plan may be foiled and you will be the one at front with the authorities.
Step 3 : Start a monopoly
In our everyday lives, money is necessary to do nearly anything. If you don’t have it, you may as well just go back to a regular life. But since we’ve started we have to find a way to get or gain this money. So, we have to start a monopoly.
Although, why a monopoly? Well, the previous step requires us to not commit any crimes, and stay under the radar. Doing any other action that interrupts the social community, would leave us within potential viewing.
By peacefully entering the marketing field with a monopoly on an item, we’ll be able to stay out of the way of larger corporations and the authorities’ eyes this way.
You want the item or object you’ll be making a monopoly on, to be small and easily gatherable. Bringing something rare or valuable will get other’s eyes looking at you. You can start small with natural products, such as fruits and vegetables, and slowly start to grow larger. Any significant or great growth may alert others to your position.
Step 4: Advertise for group/convention
Now that you’ve got a plan for money, you can set your focus on more pressing issues. As all leaders should know, there will be those who are opposed to your position, and you must try to minimize that. Ensuring that there won’t be a majority within your court will bring the best for you, as there won’t be a good chance for a rebellion.
Create a name for yourself that leaves you ambiguous, but to a point in which people still will know you by the name of it. Remember, you want to stay under the radar for this portion of the plan.
Once you’ve got your “alias” that you can go under, you can start advertising and marketing your name. Think about what you want to do during this portion of the plan and express it to the public. Although, make sure to limit the information that the public has access to.
Through your advertising, you want to form some sort of group, almost like a committee that you can trust. It’s important to gain those that you can trust, and it’s much better to do it in this part of the plan, rather than within earlier steps.
Step 5 :Gather a following
From that point on, you need to start gathering member within this “group” of yours. It is necessary for yourself to gather those who can be your eye to the public without being seen. They can make business interactions with others, whilst you prepare for the next step in your plan. To ensure that it works smoothly, put subjects through tests, to record their actions and if they can be trusted. It’s your decision on how to do this, but just don’t scare away members doing this process. A survey or a fake situation test can do this.
Try to create a headquarters of some sorts, for yourself and others to gather when necessary. Here, most operations of your plan will be executed with the committee you’ve garnered. This headquarters should have a general layout with a meeting room at least, but should also be furnished with nice furniture and other electronics. It is necessary to keep the atmosphere and mood high whilst committing certain operations.
Through these methods, you should be able to gain a following after your alias. This step is most important, as people are some of the most important parts of rebellion and leadership. Without them, it would just be yourself and those loyal to you. It is necessary to gather those who will follow under you.
Step 6 : Gain trust within members
You may gain followers, but keeping trust within members and yourself is necessary to ensure that no one tries to oppose your position. To do this, you may want to set the atmosphere to be nice and chill.
Possibly adding more to the “headquarters”, such as extra-curricular activities should be enough to gain the attention of your members, depending on how many that you’ve gathered.
Make sure your members know about the central ideas of your group that’s under your alias. Although keep some information away from them. You can’t tell them everything about your plan, rather try to direct them to a different conclusion.
Get these members to try and dislike the government. Bring up a reason for why the government should fall and exaggerate on those points. Any government should have issues that their people dislike, and bringing out these issues should give an incentive for these people to fight against the government.
Speaking about your marketing plan with your monopoly should aid yourself in this instance, allowing members to see what they are supporting. Although make sure that admittance to the group is, and will always be, free, in order to not discourage other members. Remember, we are trying to stay under the radar.
Rule #2: Betrayal
Betrayal is inevitable in this plan, with yourself performing it or others enacting on you. You must know how to deal with it at either end of the situation.
When someone enacts betrayal on you, you may perform revenge on that certain person, but it’s important to remember to keep yourself at a low with those emotions. Rather than attacking them, you must know how to use your other members to your advantage. Through their betrayal you can use your members as a front to avoid any of the consequences.
Although, if you are enacting the betrayal on someone else, make sure that no one else finds out. Try to do it sneakily, and let themselves be their own downfall. Planting evidence or turning others on them can do this to them. Only do this on those members who are conspiring on you or starting/questioning your authority over the group.
Step 7 : Get a more powerful position
Once you’ve amassed a group of trusted followers, you can start gaining power over others outside of the group. You can take it slow with political parties, or fast with rebellions, but take into account how many people you’ve managed to get into your group.
If you take it slow, make sure you start with getting a position within the vicinity of your group and headquarters. Within your party, you’ve already managed to get members within the area on your side, so it’s almost ensured that you will get elected in that matter.
Getting these positions should allow oneself to be able to have some form of power within any fashion. Use your power accordingly, but remember that your actions should be minimized to reduce those looking at you. At this point keep pushing yourself to reach your goals, as at this point you have to keep moving on.
Step 8 : Overrule those lower than your position
Now that you’ve gained a powerful position, you have to overrule those lower than your position. Remember that rebellions are inevitable, and getting these smaller groups under your control should allow oneself to minimize these issues.
Although, this action needs to be done peacefully. Doing otherwise may result in your group being investigated and your plans shutting down. This is the last step that you want to stay under the radar. Anything after this shall yield itself to your actions afterwards.
Try and get into better relationships with these groups. Holding community meetings and hearings may get these positions closer to you and on your side. You need to make sure that your trusted group can get in these positions and take control when necessary. Failure to do so will be fatal within your planning. You may need to enact other forms of plans, but taking away these smaller positions is necessary for world domination and the lack of rebellions.
You’re nearly there, but you should take into account any of your members acknowledging what they’re actually part of. Make sure to be secretive with your information and limit what gets told to them. Just a few more steps to go and you shall be able to wear that title of “World Dominator”.
Rule #3: Motivation
You have pushed yourself to the limits at this point. You may have gone through a lot and feel like there might not be much else for yourself at this moment, but you must keep moving on. You’ve done a lot for yourself at this point, and you may need motivation to keep pursuing your dreams.
Think of everything that you’ve done previously and what has pushed you to this point. The memories and the values that you hold that have pushed you here should keep pushing you to the end. Remember that you’re close and keep to yourself the plans that you hold for world domination. You’ve done this for a reason, and you’re executing that plan for that reason. It is necessary to finish these upcoming actions next. Just keep your motivations high before someone, or more likely yourself, tries to talk you out of it.
Step 9 : Overthrow the government
Gaining smaller positions should allow you to stage some sort of coup against more powerful hierarchies. Through these actions, you should be able to slowly start taking power over the people of your region and outer regions.
This may be the hardest step within your plan, but ensure that this part of the plan is solid and has minimal issues. In order to take over certain governments, allow your members to riot against an issue you’ve created against the government. It may be violent, but keep pushing towards your agendas. If you have enough push, you should be able to rule the government and overrule them entirely.
There will be issues during this process, and you will have problems. Your previous steps should have ensured that you have the least problems in this instance. If you do have any, get your members to try and fix them. If the issue keeps persisting, most likely they will be caught in the
crossfire of it all. Try and get yourself least involved with the actions of the government and your group.
You can take other paths to reach this point, such as committing crimes and whatnot, but this plan helps ensure that these steps are as easy as possible for a regular citizen. There’s not much that can come after this.
Step 10 : “Peacefully” annex the world
Now that your position has been gained and now that you’ve amassed your followers, you can start taking over the world, one country at a time. Either you can take the pacifist route and peacefully annex countries, or rather the violent route, where one can fight in wars with other countries.
The first option is recommended, although the latter may be more efficient and effective in its matters.
If you decide to take the peaceful route, you can do what you’ve done before, but on a bigger scale. Try spreading around your ideals to others, and make them hold doubt against their governments. Soon enough the word should spread and you can enact your plan with annexation. Starting rebellions and other forms of protest within countries, should allow yourself to try “aiding” those in need away from their citizens.
Trust can be built on these bonds, and most likely you can use that to your advantage. Start small with requests, but eventually make sure that you are the only one benefiting from this exchange. Any leak of information will dampen your plan, although won’t end it at this point.
Slowly enough start infiltrating your people in, and from there you can get people in your favor elected into office and even into power. From there, you’ve managed to rule over another country, Although in this situation, you will have multiple targets at once. Make sure you target those who don’t trust you. It is necessary to start slow with your actions, and eventually get them on your side.
This will be the hardest step of the process. There may be those against you, but if you have enough reinforcements and extensive planning, you should be able to get through this part of the plan.
Step 11 : Rule the World
Country after country and nation after nation, you’ve been able to take them all down. You’re left to your own wits with the whole world under your control. Now as the world leader, you can do anything you please.
Creating heinous laws with awful requirements and rules, won’t be the least of your power. You can enforce these principles on your people, but just keep in mind that they might just want to overthrow you due to these issues you make for them.
Have some fun whilst ruling the world, I mean you have worked hard to gain this position. Run a theme park! Enforce milk then cereal! Start a Mukbang Channel! Start an experimental Jazz trio with two geese! Enforce the teaching of children about the differences between bass and guitar! Get Character Development! Anything that your mind desires can become true.
Step 12 : Repeat the process :
Keep pursuing your dreams, and push yourself to keep going. There are other worlds to be conquered, and character development to be done. Repeat the process with other worlds and slowly take over their governments from within. Have some fun with these worlds and try different methods. After all, you do have a whole world that you can back yourself on.
If you do get rejected from a world, make your fast escape and try with other worlds. Although you want to avoid confrontation with those civilizations again. Try to get rid of them peacefully through annexation or manipulation. Otherwise you may get pushed into the cycle of starting again.
Ruling multiple worlds may be hard for just one person, so elect others into position for you. These will be trusted individuals who are capable of these tasks. Make sure that you stay above and beyond the radar, and make your presences known. Have fun ruling over the world and others that you may conquer on your journey.
The galaxy is now your hands, traveler. Build up upon your empire and keep pursuing those expectations and dreams. Those are 12 simple steps to rule the world, and I would like to thank you for your endeavor through these steps towards your journey to world domination.
You’ve been through it all, and now it’s your turn to make your decisions on this path. Take these 12 steps with you, and use your motivations to make your way onto the world stage. Good luck and have fun on your endeavors and adventures towards ruling the world.