Category Archives: Tech/Games

Tech/Games

JOYSTiCK Non-Review: Top 5 most-wanted characters for ‘Super Smash Bros.’ 6

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By: Daniel Kendle

Hey guys, it’s me, Daniel Scientist, here with the boys in the lab for another bumpin’ day at work. Since both business and my monkey breeding study’s been slow for the past few weeks, I’ve been hard at work whipping up hypotheticals for the next ‘Super Smash Bros.’ game.

With the Switch 2 direct and eventual release on the horizon, a new release for the series is near-inevitable. With the last entry, ‘Ultimate,’ becoming the best-selling fighting game ever, a follow-up is poised to release relatively-soon, as the conspiracy theorists want you to believe. It just so happens, however, that I’m extremely gullible!

‘Ultimate’ brought back every past fighter along with 24 newcomers, leading to a grand total of 89 playable characters. This total is gargantuan, and has led speculation for the next title to various areas of varying quality. Reboots, upgraded ports, and regular-old successors have all been thrown out, and each is an interesting concept.

For today’s report, I’ll be examining the latter-most option, as to simplify and streamline my ideas. Specifically, I’ll be sharing my top 5 most-wanted new fighters. Treat this article like a bingo board: if I get any right, I’m gospel; any wrong, I’m just stupid.

Without further ado, I hope you enjoy this research essay (please; I don’t want to go back to the monkey ranch), and let’s dive in.

. . .

#5: Chell (‘Portal’ series)

I reviewed ‘Portal’ earlier this year, and have since fallen in love with the series. I think everything from the humor, writing, gameplay, and all that stuff in-between is rich with polish, and I’m surprised at the little fanfare for representation in ‘Smash.’

Despite having only a Portal Gun to her name, I think the protagonist, Chell, has some cool moveset ideas. Obviously, portals would be the focal point: her up and down Specials could be tied to spawning the blue and orange portals respectively, with her being able to fast-travel around the stage when necessary. Her side special could be something like spawning a box, being able to pass through the portals and potentially setting up combos. A fighter mostly focused on physic systems sounds REALLY cool, but balancing would be necessary.

#4: The Knight (‘Hollow Knight’)

While I’ve never fully finished ‘Hollow Knight,’ I’ve liked what I’ve seen of it so far, even if I’m not as into it as others. Still, the titular Knight would be a great addition to the next ‘Smash’ game.

Being a “Metroidvania,” ‘Hollow Knight’ has a wide array of abilities for the Knight to obtain and use. Vengeful Spirit, Desolate Dive, and Howling Wraiths are slick Special moves that come to mind. Also, these attacks are accessible by harnessing Soul, a meter that’s raised from hitting and killing enemies. So, bringing that mechanic into ‘Smash’ would fit perfectly, in my opinion! It also helps that ‘Hollow Knight’s’ a 2D game, features a double-jump power up (which could be a cool animation to transfer over), and has many stage possibilities with its vast underground world. In particular, the Radiance’s boss arena would be rad.

#3: Paper Mario (‘Paper Mario’ series)

Public outcry has deemed Waluigi the most-wanted ‘Mario’ character, and while he’s definitely in my top 20, I’ve always preferred this spin-off series’ lead role. It’s weird; I’ve never liked characters like Dr. Mario, Toon Link, and Young Link due to being strange, unnecessary inclusions, yet love this idea.

I’m not super keen on the ‘Paper Mario’ series, but after doing some research I think there’s a strong variety of avenues to take this fighter down. Hammers, confetti, and assisting support characters could all be featured, referencing both the 2D and ring combat in different games. Not a character I can give many moveset ideas for, but a strong concept still.

#2: Raven Beak (‘Metroid Dread’)

‘Metroid’ is my favorite Nintendo franchise, and ‘Dread’ is my favorite first-party Switch game. Therefore, it’s natural for among my most-wanted newcomers to be the game’s final boss, Raven Beak. A galactic warlord, this dude not only has one of the coolest designs in the franchise’s history, but also one of the best movesets.

To port some attacks over to ‘Smash,’ his neutral jab could be the 3-hit combo he performs during his fight’s first stage. His neutral Special could be his black hole projectile, which could be charged to increase size (this is similar to Samus’s neutral Special, which could be a thematic similarity). Up special? Simple: he quickly unsheathes his wings and launches into the air, like Joker’s up Special with Arsene active. Down Special? Raven Beak plants a bomb, which, while not arena-covering like in ‘Dread,’ would do a fair amount of damage at a distance, and a critical-hit if the opponent is right next to it when it detonates. Smash attacks? Reference his animations used in parrying cutscenes.

Raven Beak and the next character are vying for my personal most-wanted addition, but I eventually went with the character below for #1 for the 3rd-party “cool factor.” Still, with Ridley being among my mains in ‘Ultimate,’ Raven Beak would be an awesome addition if anything close to my envisioned concept.

#1: The Doom Slayer (‘DOOM’ series)

I mean…where do I even start? ‘DOOM’ is one of my favorite franchises in all of media, so you can probably guess I was disappointed with its main character being relegated to a Mii Costume in ‘Smash’s’ most recent entry.

Part of why the series’s combat rules is because of its mix of melee and ranged fighting. The reason I don’t care much for fighters like Master Chief from ‘Halo’ or Heavy from ‘Team Fortress 2’ being added is because their solo-projectile movesets leave them stranded in the “Zoner” archetype, a pretty lame playstyle. But with the Doom Slayer, the franchise’s ~30 year history offers bloody, gruesome weapons from every path of life. In the upcoming game ‘DOOM: The Dark Ages,’ you get a gun that grinds down and shoots out the remains of human skulls, which is cool as hell. So, for being a fighter with a storied history, wide range of moveset possibilities, and being among my favorite game series, the Doom Slayer is officially my most-wanted fighter for ‘Super Smash Bros.’ 6.

Tech/Games

JOYSTiCK Reviews Ep. 13.5 ‘Pokemon TCG Pocket’s’ Meta – It’s Bazooka Time!

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By: Daniel Kendle

(Many terms and gameplay mechanics discussed in this article are explained further in episode 13 of JOYSTiCK. It’s advised to read that review prior to this one).

. . .

*Note: This article was written prior to the most recent expansion release. This may impact deck viability

It’s been around 5 months since ‘Pokemon TCG Pocket’ launched on mobile devices, and has been a great success for the franchise. Reportedly having generated around $500 million dollars by February of this year, the game’s critical and financial progress is guaranteed to continue for the years to come.

We’ve seen 4 booster pack expansions since the app’s launch in late October, with a 5th coming March 27: Genetic Apex, Mythical Island, Spacetime Smackdown, Triumphant Light, and soon to join the fray, Shining Revelry. With these have also come many events for both online and offline battling, obtaining rare promo cards, and more. The game’s developers seem to be attentive to the community too: after releasing a trading feature in January, it’s controversy surrounding the in-game currency required to use it has been announced to be retired later in the game’s life, either this year or 2026.

With these highlights out of the way, a large issue with the game has arisen with its continued expansion releases: the online meta surrounding deck-building and playing has become rife with overpowered cards and strategies. This is what we’ll be focusing on today, and why this is an issue. We’ll also be examining several powerful decks as examples for the argument, and finally see ways to potentially combat this issue in the future.

In short, a game’s meta is basically its current competitive state: what aspects of PVP are good or bad, and what strategies are best when playing. This is a vague description, but an all-encompassing one.

Player-versus-player gameplay in ‘Pocket’ comes down to using decks, each required to have 20 cards total. Only up to 2 of the same card can be used in a deck, leaving the player to have to employ at least 10 unique cards. Cards from different expansions can be used in tandem with each other.

The strongest type of cards in the game are “ex” cards: variations of normal Pokemon with higher health and damage, along with more unique effects wrapped into each attack. To balance this, knocking an ex out rewards 2 prize points, with 3 being needed to win a match.

Overall, with some niche exceptions, the game’s meta is mostly ex cards, which presents some issues. The main one, however, is that the over reliance on decks to use ex cards makes deck-building a more linear, provincial task.

Again, there are some commonly-used decks that forgo ex’s, but the prevalence of these cards online lead to most players combating them with their own ex’s, thus catalyzing the problem. The abundance of them online and the relatively-small pool of them combine to create a lack of variety of top-level decks to imitate. This doesn’t necessarily make matches stale, but rather streamlines creativity in making decks into choosing between several powerful options, each with a fluid “correct” list of required cards.

Ex’s as a whole also de-emphasize normal non-ex cards. Unless you have a killer strategy up your sleeve, more often than not non-ex decks struggle against their cousins. This disarray in power makes many cards in new expansions unable to break out into competitive play, unless they can support ex cards.

These problems have soured the metagame. There is still fun to be had, don’t get me wrong, but it’s not ideal to have players be pigeonholed into a selection of certain cards. Experimentation should be rampant in this game, but honestly, it’s often hard to find decks online with more uncommon cards – at least, by my standards.

Here’s a list of some of the best decks in the game, each with an explanation as to why:

  • Arceus ex – Arceus’s unique Fabled Luster ability gives it immunity to status effects. Its Ultimate Force attack is also great, giving it 20+ damage for each Pokemon on your bench (with a maximum of 3 allowed, this peaks at 130 damage). Its biggest plus, though, is other Pokémon’s Link abilities giving them unique benefits when Arceus is on the field. There’s too many to go over here, but overall, it’s nuts how much utility these cards get when paired with the ex card.
  • Gyrados ex/Greninja – For 4 energy, Gyrados’s Rampaging Whirlpool attack does 140 damage, discarding a random energy point from any Pokemon in play. Coupled with Greninja’s Water Shuriken ability letting it do 20 damage to any of your opponent’s Pokemon in addition to your active Pokémon’s attack, this allows colossal 160 damage per turn – becoming 180 damage if the opponent’s Pokemon has a water type weakness.
  • Mewtwo ex/Gardevoir – While not as prevalent as it was a few months ago, this deck is still a threat. Mewtwo’s Psydrive does 150 damage, but requires 4 energy to use, similar to Gyrados. With Gardevoir, each turn you can add an extra energy to Mewtwo using its Psy Shadow ability alongside your normal energy. This means you can attach 2 energy per turn, helpful with Psydrive discarding 2 energy from Mewtwo after being used.
  • Darkrai ex/Magnezone – This one’s pretty complicated, so listen closely. Magnezone evolves from Magneton, which evolves from Magnemite. In Genetic Apex, its Magneton card has the Volt Charge ability, which lets it attach an additional lightning energy to itself every turn, once again along with your regular per-turn energy (you don’t need to have a deck that uses lightning energy to use this card, too). Then, when evolved into the Magnezone card from Spacetime Smackdown, its Thunder Blast attack does 110 damage per turn, with the only caveat being having to discard a lightning energy after use. If you’ve hoarded a lot of energies on Magneton in turns past, then this attack becomes a menace for any deck. Couple this with Darkrai ex’s Nightmare Aura ability, which does 20 damage to the opponent’s active Pokemon whenever a darkness energy is attached to it from the discard pile. This deck is lethal, despite its complexity.

The examples listed above are fine examples of the strength of ex cards, and their numerous advantages. A lot of ‘Pocket’’s meta relies on energy acceleration: if your opponent gets an extra card when they knock you out, speed becomes the name of the game.

Once again, the current meta is far from bad, but restrictive in player expression through deck building. So, here are some of my ideas for how to improve competitive play, in my opinion:

  1. Give players stronger non-ex cards. I think that Arceus’s Link mechanic is really cool, and would like to see more stuff like it in the future. However, making the trait apply to both the ex and non-ex versions of Arceus makes the latter immediately inferior to the former, and therefore inconsequential. Why not make more regular cards that affect each other in beneficial ways? Having these in addition to ex cards could be great for diversity, and less focus on decks that mostly focus on a single attacker.
  2. Introduce more “stand-alone” cards. This point probably deviates from my first suggestion, but bear with me for a second. While cards that link with each other would be nice, another possibility is having more cards that affect all cards as a whole, instead of a select few. Giving Trainer, Item, and other supporter cards universal benefits for cards would go a long way in making some Pokemon more viable and widespread.

These were just 2 ideas, but I hope you can see the potential here. ‘Pocket’ is fun, but I think that its competitive corner is in need of improvement. I’m optimistic, honestly; these developers seem to love their game, and I think they can continue iterating on bettering PVP. Until then, though, I’ll still be looking forward to what they do next.

School Life, Tech/Games

Effects of phones on people’s education

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By: Chloe Rocha

The phrase “It’s because of your phone” is something that is commonly heard amongst adolescents. In some cases, that phrase can apply, but in others it is not necessarily accurate.

This phrase however, can apply to the education of kids during school. Cell phones have been something that is used in our day to day lives because they provide convenience and also connectivity. But at the same time they can also be proven to be a distraction while in the classroom.

There have been proven to be many negative effects of cell phone use while in the classroom, and according to an article by ‘Why Edify’, these are the top 10 reasons:

  1. Distraction
  2. Cyberbullying
  3. Academic dishonesty
  4. Social isolation
  5. Physical health issues
  6. Sleep disruption
  7. Privacy concerns
  8. Inequality
  9. Reduced physical activity
  10. Addiction

Distraction:

Decreased focus and attention in the classroom can occur because students become distracted by their phones, whether it be social media, or playing video games. These platforms are made by design to hook the user and keep them entertained. This can also be known as “doom scrolling” in some situations.

Cyberbullying:

In some cases students use their cell phone to send hurtful messages. Many adults don’t know how big of an impact cyberbullying can be and how frequently it is seen in classrooms. Nearly 42% of kids have been bullied online, according to an article by Annapolis, MD. When these children experience cyberbullying by their own classmates, it can cause them to be fearful or anxious about going to class and in the long run can have harmful effects on their education.

Academic dishonesty:

It is a very well known fact that AI has been evolving and also becoming more frequently used during people’s day to day life. Specifically in class, students have become more reliant on using AI to guide them in their class work. A global survey, that was conducted by Statista, showed that 86% of students used AI in the year of 2024. Students may also cheat during exams or assignments, simply because they have access to the answers or the information on their phones.

Social isolation:

When students use their phones excessively, it can cause them to spend less time interacting face-to-face with their own peers. Face-to-face interactions are crucial during a child’s adolescence because it allows them to develop many crucial social skills. Some of these skills include empathy, effective communication, the understanding of nonverbal cues, peer dynamics, and forming a strong sense of identity.

Physical health issues:

When cell phones are used excessively, they can begin to cause physical health problems, such as poor posture, eye strain and many other health issues.

Sleep disruption:

Cell phone use before going to bed can cause disruptions to people’s sleep patterns. When sleep patterns are disrupted, it can lead to fatigue and also a decrease in their academic performance. Sleep is important because it improves your brain performance, your mood, and also your health.

Privacy concerns:

Students may share their personal information or photographs and this can raise concerns about their privacy.

Inequality:

In many classes, a digital divide can be formed among students because not everyone may have access to a cell phone. This can cause students to feel left out from their peers.

Reduced physical activity:

This issue applies to both in school and out. During school, cell phones can discourage students from engaging in physical activity during recess or during their breaks. Outside of school, when a child has access to a cell phone, they often don’t release their energy in a physical way, like going outside, instead they go on their phones while in the house.

Addiction:

As mentioned before, many apps on your phone are by design very addictive. Mobile apps can stimulate the release of dopamine and this leads to the formation of habits. Some very popular apps that you may use that are also addictive are Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Youtube, and TikTok.

For more information, please visit:

Tech/Games

JOYSTiCK Reviews Ep. 14B: ‘Super Smash Bros. Ultimate’ – The Escape

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By: Daniel Kendle

Image taken by Silar via Wikimedia Commons: https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?search=jail+cell&title=Special:MediaSearch&type=image

Hey gang, it’s me, Mr. Whatshisname, back again with another spine-strokin’ issue of JOYSTiCK Reviews. I’m ALSO back again in a, uh, cage.

Like the sound of clanging metal in a zebra enclosure, I’ve never been…oh, what’s the point? Ever since I was kidnapped in the last part of this review, I haven’t been able to string a metaphor together. It’s miserable! Writing this serial’s never been harder with these conditions; the wind’s cold, long nights, and all I can hear outside are… animals, frankly.

But what can I do? These hellish conditions are nothing short of permanent, I’m afraid. Even after around 2 months trapped in here, no amount of probing my cell’s given way to finding some kind of exit. Without any viable alternatives for escape, I suppose I’ll be staying here for the rest of my life.

Well, dear readers, this is it. With my paper supply running on fumes, I guess this is goodbye. Thank you for reading, and please keep me in your thoughts…

…is what I’d be saying if I didn’t have an escape plan! You shallow sheeple oughta know that, like clockwork, I’d already have formulated a masterful guide on how to ditch my concrete corral. Fret not: in the next 48 hours, I’ll have transformed from an innate inmate into a free spirit, wandering amongst the living once again.

Unfortunately, my plan requires a mailed device that’ll take another good half hour to arrive here. Until then, I might as well finish some junk on my to-do list – which is a perfect segue into today’s topic: ‘Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.’ Specifically, the “World of Light” campaign. It’s here I mention that if you haven’t read my previous article on this game, it’s advised you do so before reading this. Not only will it give context words to my current entanglement, but there’s a bunch of stuff I’ll mention here that was explained there.

World of Light functions as the game’s main campaign, a common part of many fighting games, let alone ‘Smash’ titles. In this game, the campaign revolves around a new addition to the series: Spirits!

Spirits are basically customizable upgrades for your fighters. Coming in the form of a video game character, each Spirit can be equipped, giving players special abilities and defenses in matches. Some are rarer than others, and with over 1,600 of them to obtain, this leads to a vast variety in potential team setups and builds.

Spirits are obtained through Spirit Battles, where you fight a CPU-controlled fighter that’s chosen to “embody” the character – really, this amounts to the fighter being picked if they look, act, or have moves reminiscent of the Spirit. Each battle has different effects that modify how the fight will play out. Lava floors, random debuffs, gravity-switching… Once again, there’s a wide array of different effects that Spirit Battles can have, making each unique to their own character.

This is what World of Light is all about: fighting in these battles to free Spirits, then using them to free more Spirits. This cycle has you free around 600 Spirits for a 100% save file, with the other thousand or so being obtainable through other side content in ‘Ultimate.’

You also go around freeing characters. These fights don’t have any special attributes, instead being simple brawls against the respective fighter. Once freed, they can be used in single player and multiplayer fights. These aren’t the only way to obtain characters, though – you can also occasionally have the chance to fight a character after exiting the campaign menu, after fulfilling certain requirements.

Honestly, I’m very mixed on Spirits overall. This was a very brief overview of the system, but I find the hardcore focus on these battles to become tepid after a while. In World of Light, you’re basically only doing these battles, only occasionally being interrupted by boss battles, mini-games, or Spirit training buildings. These brawls are fun, but become so monotonous that they eventually mix in with one-another, becoming amorphous memories. There weren’t many super memorable fights, with the whole of them being largely forgettable. Obviously, you can’t expect 1,600 fights to each be recognizable instantly, but my point still stands: this gameplay facet of ‘Ultimate’ largely remains forgettable in the long run.

I also think Spirit fights are flawed in a major way: their special attributes. See, when each Spirit Battle has unique conditions you must fight in, when you claim Spirits that basically negate these variables, it makes many fights somewhat dull and uninteresting. Furthermore, what was once a unique fight now becomes leveled, and pretty lame. This issue is definitely subjective, and I understand why it’d be hard to completely rethink the gameplay completely, but it’s such a large factor in my lukewarm reception of the campaign that I can’t ignore it. It’s definitely my least favorite piece of ‘Ultimate,’ for what it’s worth.

I still think World of Light is fun, however. Limiting the amount of fights to around a third of the total Spirit count was a smart move, in my opinion. While the fights are still somewhat-forgettable, the lowered total amount for completion is still an upside. Also, it’s very important to note that fighting opponents is still really fun, even if using your own Spirits negates a lot of the difficulty. I’m less annoyed at Spirits, but instead a bit disappointed, really.

Other than that, the story’s alright. Nothing crazy; basically, Galeem, a god of light, has taken over the universe, swallowing each ‘Smash’ fighter and creating duplicates of them that encompass miscellaneous video game characters, turning them into Spirits. These puppet fighters take up the mantles of the sea of characters, explaining why you’re ‘freeing’ each Spirit: you’re essentially liberating them from Galeem’s control.

Eventually Dharkon, a god of darkness, defeats Galeem himself and overtakes the world. These gods fight, with you caught in the middle. I won’t spoil the ending, but it’s a very fun time, and while nothing amazing, it’s a good time all-around. And that’s a good way to summarize World of Light: nothing spectacular, but certainly not a major detriment to ‘Ultimate.’ Instead, it’s, simply-put, good.

. . .

Hey guys, it’s me, Mr. Whatshisname, back again. You may be wondering what happened after I finished explaining the World of Light experience, and why I’m now sitting in a cozy living room, in front of a roaring fire.

Image taken by Vyacheslav Argenberg via Wikimedia Commons: https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?search=Fireplace&title=Special:MediaSearch&type=image

(Sips cocoa)

I hope you’ve been enjoying these visual aids; my therapist recommended casual photography to me a while back. (Chuckles) Not yet sure how a Polaroid camera was supposed to aid my vehicular manslaughter PTSD, but hey, I eventually decided that yeah, it was time for a new hobby. And a new therapist.

Oh, right, my escape! Yeah, it wasn’t that complicated, honestly. I ordered this weird door I saw on Craigslist the other day with a glowing green eye on top. Once I walked through it, I was transported into this weird antimatter dimension, until being dropped back home again. How convenient! I currently have 13 different felony warrants for my arrest.

Anyways, I think that about sums up my thoughts on ‘Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.’ A fantastic game overall, with tons of fun to be had by all. With tight gameplay, fun side content, and an enjoyable, albeit disappointing story mode, I’ll be giving this game a 9/10.

And with that out of the way, that’s all the time I have with y’all today! Thanks for tuning into this episode of JOYSTiCK Reviews, and have a great week.

Student Creative Writing, Tech/Games

JOYSTiCK Non-Review: Will the Nintendo Switch 2 result in a 2nd US Civil War?

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By: Daniel Kendle

*Note: The following is a satirical take on the release of Switch 2 teaser.

Photo of Elon Musk by Debbie Rowe via Wikimedia Commons

WASHINGTON, D.C. – On Thursday, January 16, Nintendo posted a teaser for a new upcoming console, alongside the company’s international affiliates. Roughly 2 minutes in length, the video showcased the Nintendo Switch 2: a successor to the soon-to-be 8-year-old system of the same name.

Notable for both its physical and internal upgrades, many astute fans of the original Switch have noted its needed – albeit simple – updates to its older brother. While controversies have risen due to these occasionally-minor changes, many have agreed upon feeling relief and excitement about the console’s acknowledgement. A follow-up direct, focused on software is slated for April 2, 2025.

Around the same time, however, came the inauguration of now-president Donald J. Trump, seceding the former Joe Biden. Also mired in controversy, the election’s collision course has coincided with the console’s public reveal, leaving some to connect the 2 in various ways – most of all, the Presidents.

“I saw [the trailer] the Friday after – yeah, it was cool,” said Trump, immediately following a press conference in Atlanta. “I was like, ‘Vance, did you see this?’ And he was like ‘Yeah,’ and we fist-bumped. I dunno, man […] but I thought the new Joy-Cons were sick. Larger, too. I was talking to Joe ‘bout it a week later; he was tripping too. Did these (gestures) hand…things. Yeah. I was like, ‘Hunter would love this,’ and he laughed, and agreed. Hunter loves Mario; he’s so cool.”

Now-former President Biden was also open to an interview.

“Donnie and I had gotten off a meeting when the trailer dropped; some real good [explicative]. I was less enthused at first, really: I saw Donkey Kong’s new redesign during the ‘Mario Kart’ segment and was like ‘Damn, this too?’ Then Trump came over to my place and we played ‘8 Deluxe’ for a while…felt good. Felt better. Kamala was excited, too – did a backflip over her desk. Favorite reveals? Shoot, uh […] like, maybe the, tch, backwards compatibility? Y’know, being able to play my Switch library at launch is a treat. Gotta do a run of my favorite, uh, Switch game: ‘Balan Wonderworld’.” (Note: immediately following the latter-most statement, former President Biden was lobbed in the head with a snowball).”

While these 2 men proved satisfied with the new system’s reveal, other political figures – including some close with the country leaders – were less than optimistic about the trailer.

“It’s [explicative], pardner,” said Elon Musk, in the process of bathing himself with the blood of a sheep when we interviewed him. “Jus’ trash all-‘round. I’m happy for…you know, I’m happy fer those excited, but like, really? After 8 years o’ buildup, we git some gall-darn magnets for them controllers?! Y’all need some bett’r standerds. Rattlesnake tumbleweed cactus.”

With the division with Trump’s republican cabinet apparent, some citizens question whether or not a feud will brew from inside – and possibly spill out into the rest of the US. It’s been close to 200 years since our country’s first Civil War, and in our current day and age, political events and conspiracies have led to heated debate between sectors of the 50 states.

Whether or not the Nintendo Switch 2’s existence will culminate in a new Civil War is yet to be said, but until then we can only speculate, both on the system and our country’s political affairs. Only 1 thing’s certain, however: if this new console has any form of Joy-Con drift again, I think the nukes are gonna drop.

Tech/Games

How “Brainrot” and “Doomscrolling” affect your brain

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By: Karl Salkowski

(Image credit: freerangestock)

Oxford has recently announced “brainrot” as the word of 2024. But what is brainrot? Well, the dictionary defines brainrot as “the supposed deterioration of a person’s mental or intellectual state, especially viewed as the result of overconsumption of material considered to be trivial or unchallenging”.

The term brainrot is not a recent term. The word has been used for over 20 years. Originally, brainrot was used to describe the use of email. According to Theguardian.com, email’s “constant cognitive overload had a more negative effect than taking cannabis, with IQs of participants dropping an average of 10 points.” If email can have such drastic effects, it’s hard to imagine how damaging short form online content and electronic devices such as smartphones can be.

Over the past couple of years more and more information has come to light about the effects of consuming large quantities of short form content. Institutions such as the University of Oxford and Harvard Medical School have found that consuming this content in large quantities can shorten our attention spans, weaken memory, and mess with our cognitive processes.

According to Dr. Gloria Mark, a professor at the University of California, attention spans have drastically shortened over the past 20 years. In 2004 the average attention span was 150 seconds, by 2012 the average was 75, and by 2018 it was down to 47 seconds. This massive decline is partly due to the rise of social media.

According to Theguardian.com, the average Gen Z teenager in the UK has an average screen time of somewhere between 5 ½ and 6 ½ hours every day, with the average adult spending 4 hours online every day.

Doomscrolling is a somewhat newer phenomenon. Doomscrolling is defined as, “the excessive consumption of short-form videos or social media content for an excessive period of time without stopping.” The term began to gain popularity in 2020 partly due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

Doomscrolling is a form of internet addiction. An estimated 31% of Americans doomscroll on a regular basis. This increases greatly among young people with an estimated 51% of Gen Z addicted. Social media plays a significant role, allowing users to infinitely scroll through short form videos uninterrupted.

Multiple medical institutions have found that doomscrolling can worsen depression and anxiety. Overall, doomscrolling and brainrot have contributed to worsening mental health among teens and adults. It might be time to put down your phone.

If you want to learn more about the effects of social media, please go to:

Tech/Games

JOYSTiCK Reviews Ep. 15 ‘Portal’ – Holes in Logic, Logic in Holes

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By: Daniel Kendle

(This article was written a week prior to the events transpiring in the ‘Super Smash Bros. Ultimate’ article. Spoilers are also included).

Hey guys, welcome back to JOYSTiCK Reviews, and by golly-gosh, I sure do love being currently alive and free! It’s such a benign feeling; it’s as if I have… rights. Hope nothing changes within the next few days to possibly reverse my current elation.

Of course, the subsequent step to continue this high is to find a way to break apart reality so that way I don’t have to let my mortal form hold my soul hostage from true joy. Now, normally someone like me, Mr. Whatshisname, should go about this through, say (chuckles), the irreparable-breakdown of known physics or whatever, but unfortunately for still-human me, that’s not possible. So, I suppose I’ll have to compromise through virtual simulation. What am I talking about? Why, it’s the video game ‘Portal.’

‘Portal’ is a game released by Valve in 2007, commonly-cited as among the greatest video games made during the 2000’s. The premise consists of the player character being a testing subject for a fictional Portal Gun, allowing the use of teleportation through orange and blue portals (doy). Through this new tool, the object of the game is to complete 19 levels, each with their own puzzles and hazards to overcome.

In the game, portals work as follows: the player gets up to 2 at a time, an orange and a blue portal. They connect to each other, being shot out of the gun to a nearby wall. Then, the player can walk, jump, or fall through. Momentum is carried through if entered through vertical ascension or descension, allowing for further mobility.

In addition to the Portal Gun, you can also pick up and place certain objects, jump, and press buttons. These combined features open up a plethora of concepts that’ll often make you scratch your head at first, then eventually learn and adapt to. ‘Portal’ is one of those rare games who’s mechanics differ from what the human mind is adjusted to in real life; we don’t have teleportation, and the technology present in the game is entirely fictional as of now. This means that any new player will have to take time figuring out the game’s mechanics, which is quite beautiful.

‘Portal’s’ puzzles are great, and it’s clear the developers at Valve had plenty of ideas while making the game. 19 levels doesn’t sound like a lot (and it isn’t, more on this later), but each has intricacies that require full concentration and dedication to figure out the Portal system as a whole. Heck, mastering moving and portal momentum allows skipping some parts of levels entirely, a great way to reward those who put in the work.

I do think that the penultimate level, among another few, are pretty tedious to complete, but it’s always satisfying to reach the elevator at the end of each. The final level, however, is easily ‘Portal’s’ best. To explain, let’s dive into ‘Portal’s’ story; spoilers ahoy!

The game’s plot is simple: you’re a test subject named Chell who awakens deep inside Aperture Science Laboratory. You’ve been tasked to complete 19 puzzles in order to test out their new Portal Gun, with the promise of cake at the end.

As you complete levels, the omnipotent voice over the loudspeaker becomes more and more deranged, if still playful. You also experience various strange moments throughout your misadventures – a couple of stages feature broken, disheveled holes in the walls leading to behind-the-scenes lab equipment. Bloody writing from past test subjects also appears, stating, “THE CAKE IS A LIE.”

Finally, after finishing level 19 the voice attempts to kill off the player in a room of lava, but you escape and explore the rest of the lab’s interiors. Abandoned, you’re taunted by the voice until escaping, reaching a large room where GLaDOS lives: a self-aware AI who’s been the one over the loudspeaker since the beginning. Angered by your escape, you fight, dismantling her “personality spheres” by throwing them in a fiery vat and killing her.

The game ends with the player outside after an explosion, being dragged away by an unknown robot. Credits roll after the reveal that yes, there was cake indeed, and an ending song sung by GLaDOS plays: “Still Alive”.

‘Portal’s’ story is great, if a tad simple. Simple’s not a bad thing, however – plot beats are memorable and interesting, and the game has a sharp sense of humor; very dry and occasionally dark. GLaDOS has quickly become among my favorite fictional characters, let alone video game antagonists. I highly recommend listening to “Still Alive” on Spotify or whatever, because it’s a very experimental and interesting theme for the story’s villain. There aren’t many spoilers in it, except for the fact that the game’s antagonist survives (shocker, I know).

‘Portal’s’ story and gamplay are awesome, but if there’s 1 big drawback, it’s its length. At around 3 hours, the experience is very short, even with additional external content after the credits end. I’m glad there’s a sequel, but the first game’s short time leaves it difficult to enjoy replaying; with its few levels, knowing what to do for each is easy to remember.

Despite this, ‘Portal’ is a fantastic experience, and I completely get the hype for it. For being 18 years old, the package runs well and holds up, even graphically. Hiccups in some puzzles and its runtime lead me to a fitting score of 8/10, which I think is fair.

But that’s that: I’ve been rambling for a while, so I think a nice walk is in order for me! Recently I saw a gingerbread house out in the woods; a visit may be in order for me soon. Until next time my friends, thank you for reading.

Editorials/Student Voice, School Life, Tech/Games

The real reason some students use AI

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By: Nathaniel de Sam Lazaro

In the educational world today, much is made about artificial intelligence (AI) and how it could be used by students to cheat in their classes. 

By using AI, students are able to create work with far less effort than if they did it themselves, creating a well warranted fear amongst teachers that their students may be using AI to cheat by passing off AI generated work as their own. Not only is this academically dishonest, it actively hinders the student’s education. This fear among educators has been exacerbated by the increasing difficulty of differentiating work made by AI from that made by students.

Personally, I have never used AI to cheat, though I will admit to having intrusive thoughts of doing so from time to time. This thought comes up whenever I am struggling with an assignment, telling me that I could perhaps earn the same grade more easily, without doing any work. 

The reason I’ve never given in is not out of a fear of being caught or some compulsion to blindly follow rules, but because I know that by doing so, I would be hindering my own education. I wouldn’t be gaining the knowledge or skills that I would have if I were to do the assignment myself. This mentality is what has prevented me from giving in to this urge. But this made me realize that students who do use AI are doing so because they don’t value their own learning, only valuing the grade they earn in the class.

I was curious about what other people’s mentalities toward this were, so I asked some of my friends the following question: “If you could have AI do some or all of your assignments, knowing that there was no chance you would ever be caught, would you do so, and why?” Their responses intrigued me. 

Some people told me that no, they wouldn’t use AI in any cases, because they wouldn’t learn without doing so. This is similar to my mentality, and everyone seemed to agree with this in at least some of their classes. Some friends of mine stated that they would do so for certain classes, since they thought that those classes’ material didn’t matter for their planned careers. In other words, they saw no value in these classes other than to pass them, moving them closer to graduating. 

How does this happen, that these students don’t see any value in their learning except to pass a test, to get good grades, to get into college, and to start their career? They aren’t born this way. Young children have an endless amount of questions on their mind. They are naturally curious, ask deep questions, and annoy their parents by constantly asking “Why?”

By contrast, High School students only seem to see school as a transaction to get to where they want in life, and gain the information taught for the purposes of passing a test and getting an “A”. What happens that takes this natural curiosity out of our students between when they start elementary school and when they get to high school? What drives these students to use AI to pass their class, while they are missing out on learning and skills they would gain by doing their work on their own, missing out on the answers to the deep questions they asked when they were a child?

I think the answer is that our education system, and society as a whole, emphasizes grades above all else. If I could use AI and get the same grade, why not do so? Yes, I would be missing out on learning, but that doesn’t matter if all that I care about is my grade. In the above hypothetical, there are no consequences for using AI. One could get an A without doing any work on their own. In order to choose not to do so, a student would need to value learning, knowledge, and curiosity in and of themselves in order to get the most out of their education. Unfortunately, what is usually valued most by parents, educators, colleges, and society as a whole, is simply a letter on a piece of paper or computer screen. And in many cases, the allure of that letter grows to outweigh or even destroy any value one may have placed on what it is supposed to represent. 

Tech/Games

All powers in ‘Wild Life’!

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By: Julia Yang

The saga of ‘Life Series’ articles is almost coming to a close, but it’s never too late to discuss the latest season!

‘Wild Life’ is of course by far the most wild season, where every session is a different wild event! In session 7 every member was selected a random superpower! I loved this session so much that I want to explain to you every power, who got it, and how I think it connects to the person!

Grian – Copycat/Mimic

Grian had the ability to copy any other player’s superpower for 5 minutes, all he had to do was simply find and right click on a player to copy it.

Grian gave himself this power because he’s the creator of all of the “wild cards” (events), which meant he also came up with the powers!

I can go into lore to explain why this can possibly draw back to it, but I don’t want to waste your time with lore.

Cleo – Necromancy

Cleo had the ability to summon zombies back from the dead— no, like literally. She brought back all of the dead players.

Previously dead players Mumbo and Skizz came back from the grave for this session, but not as the same Mumbo and Skizz you may remember. They came back from the dead to serve the person they get summoned by, and no more than that. They each only have four hearts and listened to Cleo’s every command, no matter how hard or weird it may be.

When Mumbo and Skizz die, Cleo can simply summon them back, but they’re on a cooldown of 5 minutes.

Cleo has this power because her full gamer tag/YouTuber username is “ZombieCleo” and her Minecraft skin is literally a zombie! How could she not have this power?

Etho – Windburst

Etho had the ability to use a windburst and go up dramatically higher than the normal player and take absolutely no damage!

Although he had a mace and fishing rod which made his power extremely dangerous to be around, I don’t believe he ever landed a hit or killed anyone with it besides Gem (and Skizz, the zombie that’ll come back anyway)!

This power has absolutely no connection to Etho, but it was fun nonetheless!

Bdubs – Time

Bdubs had the ability to slow down time for about 10-15 seconds and sleep at night to make it daytime.

By “slowing down time”, I mean when he used his power, absolutely everything in the whole server would get slowed to this snail paced speed. It confused many when he used it the first time, because it affects everybody and they didn’t know who did it.

In a regular ‘Life Series’ season, all members of the server would need to sleep if they wanted to skip the night, which is impossible in a server of 18 people worried about dying and killing other members.

Bdubs hates the night time, he finds nothing good about it besides that it’s pretty! Back on the ‘Hermitcraft’ server, Bdubs can be called the “Sun God” or “Sleeping Master” because every single time it gets even close to night time, Bdubs is always there to sleep the night away using a mod. Now, in this one session of ‘Wild Life’ he can finally sleep the night away too!

Bdubs has time based powers because of his odd obsession with the Minecraft clock! He uses the clock to tell the time if it’s late and should go to sleep, and if he has one (which he usually does), it’s in his off-hand! Like a lucky charm!

Lizzie – Darkness

Lizzie had the ability to blind people and disappear for about 5 seconds.

This power was very dangerous, but Lizzie is a pretty non-pvp person so there wasn’t much to worry about!

Lizzie got this power because her full gamer tag/YouTuber username is “LDShadowLady”, it’s perfect really!

Joel – Triple Jump

Joel had the ability to triple jump. This was about it.

It doesn’t seem that good in text, but he had a lot of fun with it and it saved his life multiple times!

This power has no connection to Joel, but he enjoyed it and that’s all that matters!

BigB – Creaking

BigB had the ability to summon a small group of the Creaking mob.

He didn’t use this ability much because it wasn’t that helpful, but it was cool to look at!

BigB got this power because his whole shtick for this season was that he lived in the Pale Forest (the Creaking biome) and even had a Creaking skin! Like I said, it wasn’t useful, but man was it cool to see!

Tango – Speed

Tango had the ability to run at an insane speed.

He ran at an impossible speed to hit or kill, but it came at a price of ultimate starvation. His power was something he could toggle on and off, but insisted on leaving it on because what was the point of turning it off?

The entire server hated him in this session because he was basically unkillable and was rubbing it in everyone’s faces, of course in the end though, he did manage to die.

Tango connects to this power because Tango would like to flee more than pvp anyone! He isn’t very good at pvp and would like to avoid it at all costs, being more brains than brawn.

One of his most known catchphrases is to “flee with extra flee”!

Pearl – Flight

Pearl had the ability to jump up extremely high and fly as if she had an elytra on!

At first she thought it was just the big jump, but Grian eventually showed her that she can actually fly around. This power even came with a cool hat!

The only way I could connect this back to Pearl was that fans often thought of her as a moth because of her full name “Pearlecentmoon”!

Martyn – Super Hearing

Martyn had the ability to hear anything he could see!

If he were to hover his crosshair over a group of people from over a mile away, he could hear their entire conversation!

This connects to Martyn through lore! Just a snippet of what there is, Martyn is called a “listener” in the story that he has made for the series, which is perfect for his power!

Scott – Mob Morph

Scott had the ability to transform into (almost) any mob!

As long as he could click on it, he could transform into it!

This power doesn’t exactly connect to Scott in any way, it was actually given to him because it’s a passive power and he was on his green life which meant he couldn’t kill anyone, thus getting a boring power.

Ren – Player Morph

Ren had the ability to transform into any player on the server!

As long as he could click on the player, he could transform into them, skin and name tag!

You could say this power connects to Ren because he’s a theater kid and loves to role-play and act! Ren loves storytelling and playing as characters; this power couldn’t have been more perfect.

Jimmy – Invisibility

Jimmy had the ability to go invisible!

All he had to do was press a button and he could go invisible for an infinite amount of time!

This one I don’t believe can connect to him in any way, but he had a blast using it!

Gem – Astral Projection

Gem had the ability to go into spectator mode and talk to ghosts!

When Cleo’s zombies, Mumbo and Skizz, aren’t walking around in the overworld, they’re flying around as ghosts where Gem can then have a conversation with them.

I personally can’t connect this to her in any way, but I’m sure someone can, considering the lore behind her character!

Impulse – Teleportation

Impulse had the ability to teleport and swap places with another player using that same teleportation!

Anywhere he could see, he could teleport to, but to swap teleport with somebody, he had to be very precise about where his crosshair was because if they’re not right on the crosshair, he could miss which could be a vital mistake.

Impulse has nothing to do with teleportation, but he did manage to kill tango!

Scar – ???

Scar had the ability to sit on anything— including on other players’ shoulders, and hit players with a knock back of like 10 blocks!

This power couldn’t really be given a name because obviously they’re two very drastically different things, it was more so given to him so he could enjoy himself!

This once again can’t be connected back to Scar, but he had loads of fun with it.

I do believe these are all of the powers, and how they may connect to their corresponding person! The ‘Wild Life’ season is over, and so is my collection of ‘Life Series’ articles.

I bid you all adieu!

Tech/Games

All you need to know about ‘Hades 2’

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By: Persephone Pond

‘Hades 2’ is an upcoming roguelike action role playing video game developed and published by the studio Supergiant Games. As the name suggests, ‘Hades 2’ serves as a sequel to the hit indie game ‘Hades’, which was also developed and published by the same studio. This article will cover all you need to know about this upcoming masterpiece of a game.

‘Hades 2’ is currently available for purchase as an early access release on PlayStations 4 and 5, Xbox One, Xbox Series X and series S, and Microsoft Windows. Early access to this game means the game isn’t fully released. In addition to bug fixes and new mechanics, Supergiant Games has also been adding new characters and stories in big updates to the game as users continue to test the current mechanics.

With the early access of this game, initially released in May of 2024, many fans have begun to speculate the full release date of the game on a wider variety of platforms. These speculations have led to the conclusion that the full version of the game could be released anywhere between quarters 2 and 4 of 2025 due to the extensive build of the game so far. This timeline is earlier than expected, since Supergiant’s previous game, ‘Hades’, was in early access for over 2 years before its full console release.

So far, in its 8 months of availability, the game has received overwhelmingly positive reviews from returning fans and new players. Especially considering that ‘Hades 2’ is Supergiant’s first sequel, the game maintains a good balance of mechanics from the original ‘Hades’ and new unique aspects that make the game feel different and avoid the feeling of repetition between games.

From creative and unique interpretations of figures from Greek mythology to the fighting mechanics, ‘Hades 2’ is on track to be one of the biggest releases of 2025. In 2023, ‘Hades 2’ was nominated for the Most Anticipated Game at The Game Awards and Most Wanted Award at the Golden Joystick Awards.

So, whether you’re a returning ‘Hades’ fan or a newcomer to the games, keep an eye out for the full release of ‘Hades 2’.